TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
Maria:Here is it.
TEACHER:Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
TEACHER:Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK:Because of the sign.
FRANK:The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
TEACHER:John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the Floor?
JOHN:You told me to do it without using tables.
TEACHER:Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
TEACHER:No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD:Yesterday you said it's H to O.
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
TEACHER:Glen, Why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN:Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS:Because George still had the ax in his hand.
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's.
Did you copy his?
CLYDE:No, teacher, it's the same dog.
TEACHER:Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are
no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.