Saturday, April 15, 2006

Pregnancy Q & A

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?

A: No, 35 children is enough.


Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.


Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?

A: Childbirth.


Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.

A: So what's your question?


Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?

A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.


Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?

A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.


Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?

A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.


Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?

A: Yes, pregnancy.


Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?

A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.


Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?

A: When the kids are in college.

3 comments:

SafeTinspector said...

Ha! I'm going to tell these to my wife. (We're expecting our second child end of July)

Tynna said...

hehhe...Hey Jokemail...how do I send you a joke?

Kim Ayres said...

I'll send you an e-mail with my address