Monday, August 14, 2006

Classes for men!

NEW EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!!! ALL ARE WELCOME OPEN TO MEN ONLY

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants each. Sign up early and get a discount on registration.

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS- Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?- Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR - Practicing with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?- Debate among a panel of experts.

LOSS OF VIRILITY: - Losing the remote control to your significant other - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS -starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming - Open forum


DAY TWO

EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?- Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH- PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST- Real life testimonial from the one man who did.

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS? - Driving simulation

LIVING WITH ADULTS; BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR PARTNER- Online class and role playing

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION- Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE- Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME- Individual counsellors available

7 comments:

me said...

to update yesterdays, the couple had been in heaven a couple of weeks and they stumbled accross a room full of clocks, all of which were turning ever so slightly backwards. intrigued they asked a passing saint what the purpose of the clocks were.
"ah, they represent everyones lives, and every discretion moves the clock back an hour"
the couple looked around noticing the famous peoples and asked
"wheres president bushes?"
"oh that" says the saint, "thats in the kitchens, we use it as a fan"

Tynna said...

JM! so I suppose these classes men have to attend is all becoz of women? hehehehehe.:p
serve them right!!

Fat Sparrow said...

Okay, I'm at a loss. How on earth do we e-mail you about reciprocal links? Is this a test? Am I failing? Do I worry too much? WHY HAVEN'T YOU CALLED ME?! Ooops, never mind that last one. No, really, though, I've linked you to my sucky blog; can you add poor, desperate me?

Thanks,

Fat Sparrow

Kim Ayres said...

Cappuccino - :)

Black Feline - I went on the course, but they were sadly lacking a bit about why women don't leave the toilet seat up

Fat Sparrow - I don't have a public email address, so you just need to ask me in the comments. I've left a comment on your site. Hopefully I'll be able to link to you soon.

Fat Sparrow said...

JM --

I've responded in the comments section on my blog. Please do e-mail me or contact me. I really am interested in knowing what your thoughts are, regarding some of the questions I have.

Thanks,

Fat Sparrow

Binty McShae said...

It's all bullshit y'know, Jokey... Propoganda designed to fuel the battle of the sexes - a battle which neither side can win. We should all just live together in harmony and accept that whilst there are some men who fail to change toilet rolls there are also women who do the same. And - shock horror - there are men who manage to complete every one of the tasks you mention. Except the 'living with always being wrong'. Because no-one is always wrong. So let's all hold hands in a big circle around the world and sing an appropriately gender-non-specific song about harmonious living!

Kim Ayres said...

Sounds like you need a hug Binty, but I'm a bloke so you'll have to get it somewhere else.