Thursday, August 17, 2006

Need a Push

A man and his wife are awakened at 3 a.m. by a loud pounding on the door.

The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. "Not a chance," says the husband. "It's three o'clock in the morning!" He slams the door and returns to bed.

"Who was it ?" asks his wife. "Just a drunken stranger asking for a push," he answers.

"Did you help him?" she asks.

"NO, I didn't! It's three in the morning and raining like hell out there!"

"Well you've got a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down on holiday and two blokes helped us. I think you should help him."

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, goes out into the pounding rain, and calls out into the dark, " Hello, you still there?"

"Yes," comes the answer.

"Do you still want a push," calls out the husband.

"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.

"Where are you?" asks the husband.

"Over here on on the swing," the drunk replies.

7 comments:

me said...

oh man, they are getting cornier!
but still putting a smile on my face every morning! just the medicine after a night at work.
hope you didn't mind the lenghty one on the last post,

Kim Ayres said...

I'm glad you're enjoying them :)

I replied to the last one on the last post

me said...

sorry. x1,ooo,ooo.
am i forgiven?
should have checked, would have saved me a lot of time. doh!
got a book full of that sort of stuff! e-tales, published by cassell and co.
i have a good collection of joke books too, so if you get writers block any time, mail me your e-mail address via my site and i will gladly drop you a few in your mail box.
was going to put some up myself before i found you, but you are doing such a good job i don't need to now!

Lost said...

sorry guys, but i have to say that i found your exchange in the previous post hilarious!

me said...

hey, a double act? could work!

Kim Ayres said...

Don't worry about it, CK, once or twice I've posted jokes up here only to suddenly remember that I've actually posted them before. It's not always easy to keep track.

I've still got plenty of jokes to keep me going for several months yet, but when I start drying up I might open up to contributions, or even make it a group site.

me said...

thats cool, you know my whereabouts!